who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize