I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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