We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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