are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
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