nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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