ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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