I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Randomize
