we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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