Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
