I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
