I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
