I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
so let's talk penis.
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PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
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Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
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