I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
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