i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
