Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize
