I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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