I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
