I wanna bring you to show and tell
My room smells like vodka and shame
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
