You can't motorboat a personality
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
