Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize