How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
