I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize