I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
