i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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