I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize
