i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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