she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
