who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Randomize
