their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Randomize
