the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
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you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
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You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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