i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
The Olympian is in my bed
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
