ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
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