Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Randomize
