My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
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