Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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