New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize