I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
