The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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