it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
