And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
