I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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