As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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