I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
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