Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
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