There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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