I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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