And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
