Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Acid is not a monday night drug
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Randomize
