I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
