Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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