yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize
